If Animal Names Were Totally Honest

Shark biologist David Shiffman decided earlier this month to call out animals with #StupidCommonNames by asking fellow scientists to share the common names of animals that are misleading, weird and just plain stupid.

Unlike an organism’s scientific name, which is internationally-recognized and identifies the particular animal’s genus and species, common names are more informal and can vary from country to country.

Some of them even sound like insults hurled on the playground. Take, for example, the Creek Chubsucker (a type of fish), the Slippery Dick (also a fish) or the Sarcastic Fringehead (seriously, who’s in charge of naming fish?).

How about the slippery dick? What did it ever do to you, science? #stupidcommonnames pic.twitter.com/ts0FfQYV82

— Sarah Keartes (@sarahkeartes) September 1, 2015

Others just don’t make any sense (if you’re a scientist):

#StupidCommonNames is my new favorite hashtag. @WhySharksMatter pic.twitter.com/DRqRfEEKog

— Bird and Moon (@RosemaryMosco) September 1, 2015

Now, thanks to the glorious depths of the Internet, common people (of the non-scientific variety) have intervened and renamed some of our favorite animals on Facebook community, Beast Boy. And, TBH, they just make so. much. sense.

Below, meet the newly dubbed animals the way God intended us to name them.

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